thankfulness

Here we are again trying to get a blog going. It’s funny because I think about making this blog a real thing but I just never put myself out there. So afraid to have people think I am fake or trying too hard. Today is the day, letting those fears drop. I also started a lot of other things today. For example, I have worked for the second day and a row. I am sure you are thinking wow two days big deal. I know its actually hilarious to see myself type that. The thing is I borderline the “not fat but not skinny” after kids. I care but I don’t want to do the work. Well, that is over….. big time. I am coming to an age that they call “middle age”. In my head, it’s now or never and it is only going to get harder if I don’t start now. I lost a baby in January (more on that later). It wakes you up!

The alarms are ringing. A lot of alarms! I feel like there has been a huge awareness lately to how short life is. I have so many dreams and goals I still want to do. I want to die trying to live the best life. I am not talking about things and vacations, I am talking about daily life. I want to live the best life daily, in normal things. I am so tired of feeling tired. I want life-giving conversations. Slow evenings with the husband. I want to enjoy my kids discovering this big beautiful world. I want to love people and make them feel special just the way they are. I want to walk in daily gratitude, I want to be looking for ways to serve around me.

We are still living north and loving it. It has been a huge change but overall I think for the better. Besides missing friends and loved ones.

The fun news for May so far is my mother-in-love is moving here in two weeks. I am so excited. She is amazing and I can’t wait for my kids to have family here with them. Hoping the father-in-love will also join us eventually.

Its been an amazing winter, but so excited to have summer.

The summer liv list (which I am sure I will be adding to) :

Camping in Norway (near the beach)
Stand up paddle boarding in the lake
Lots of bike rides
Plants some flowers with the girls
Lots of ice cream
Picking flowers and seeing if we can paint them
Finally, get Majkens US passport
Weekend trip to Stockholm
Go to museums near us

Do you have an summer plans? We also have a lot of house projects we need to get done.

“Risk opens the door to opportunity” -Blue Bloods

How good is this quote? So good it just slapped you in the face! Right! This is my motto for this season! I am really trying to brake out into new things this year. I have been wanting to do some of these things for years (this blog being one of them) and I have just let day by day go by because of fear or scared of the risk. It is almost stupid when I think about it. Instead of being annoyed with myself and just decieded to take small steps daily towards the direction of where I want to be in the next coming year. It’s hard but I think it will be so worth it.

My friend James just started his youtube channel click here. His first video is about becoming an idea machine and basically developing your muscle in your brain. Its pretty interesting. So you have to write 10 ideas a day on different subjects. He is doing it off of a book which I can’t remember at the moment and I don’t feel like watching the video again, but I am interested to try this. I feel like I come up with ideas all the time but I fail to execute things. Which is the worst part. If you don’t execute who cares if you have a brilliant idea. It is just an idea. So basically I just want to see if this inspires more creative outlets for me or just makes me feel overwhelmed with all my ideas. Please just slap me.

I am not going to post what I write every day here because that I not what this space if for, I was however very surprised with how this one prompt made me think. The prompt was write down things you don’t like and see how you can be greatful for them. I like to think I am positive person and grateful for a lot things.

I write often in a journal what I am thankful, but I never sit down and think what do I don’t like. So it actually took me a while to find things. After I sat down and did it I was pretty shocked at how it made me feel. A lot of things where changing habits.

So even more now I want to embrace fear, I want to feel it, touch it and walk through it. I want to take risks that take my breath away that make me have a dance party in my living (ok i have those everyday….really) I want to see how my small little nothing dream becomes a reality. No longer in my head and heart but in my hand and in the hands of others.

Its time to set off! Ok so what that really means is its time for some really hard work.

A year from now you may wish you had started today -Karen Lamb

Giddy up

Risk and Fear